The Hate List 1

So, the postman obviously put his back out trying to carry all my Valentine's cards and gifts on Monday... oh well. Onwards and upwards, and to show I'm really not bitter, here is my first (of many, I'm sure) rundown of those little things that niggle me.

1. Three-quarter length sleeves; Just no. When is there ever an appropriate weather condition for these abominations? And why to manufacturers insist on making a great deal of attractive jumpers lacking in the sleeve department? Does anyone love their forearms that much? Have the fast fashion bigwigs never experience that cringey feeling on trying to put anything over three-quarter sleeves without getting that disgusting feeling bunchy weird arm look? And don't even get me started on 'bracelet length' coats and jackets. Ten types of wrong.

2. Maxi dresses; Now, don't get me wrong, on the right person, the maxi dress can look stunning, however, this person is usually nearly 6 ft. I am, however, only 5ft3in. Why can't they do a petite-maxi? It would be the perfect oxymoronic dress.

3. Leather; (except shoes of course, I'm not vegan or nuttin'!) Face it, although the rags might tell us that a pair of leather shorts or a leather mini is a must-have, there are very few people who can pull it off without looking like a dominatrix or Jeremy Clarkson, or both. I don't even look good in leather jackets. My last foray into the biker chick look (a gorgeous sage green ToSho number) made me look like Roy Cropper. Seriously.

4. Not glamming up; I admit that I am writing this whilst wearing a particularly fetching pair of tartan pyjama bottoms and a man's tee, but that is acceptable as nobody is going to see me like this. I just get upset with people who haven't looked in a mirror before subjecting me to their 'style'. And do not even get me started on people who don't make any effort on a night out, as least put on a nice top if you insist on wearing jeans, jeez! I'm not asking everyone to stick on a low cut dress and a pair of stillettos, but well... actually I am!

5. Bikinis that you cannot swim in; this surely needs no explanation.

6. Leggings worn as trousers; I love leggings, I really do. But they should only be worn under dresses or tops that are long enough to cover your front bum.

Have you got any more for me? Or maybe I've struck a nerve with you?